Holly Madison 'never had informal intercourse' before Hugh Hefner: 'I was kind of truly asexual'
Taryn Ryder·Writer, Yahoo Entertainment
Tue., January 25, 2022, 12:48 a.M.·6 min study
Holly Madison stocks intimate details about Hugh Hefner and her time on the Playboy Mansion in Monday's Secrets of Playboy foremost. Madison released to fame on E!'s The Girls Next Door as Hefner's No. 1 girlfriend, relationship the American writer from 2001 to 2008.
"I wasn't physically attracted to Hef, however I did find him very charming," Madison admits inside the A&E docuseries.
Holly Madison, Hugh Hefner, Bridget Marquardt and Kendra Wilkinson in 2008 quickly earlier than Hefner and Madison broke up.
Holly Madison, Hugh Hefner, Bridget Marquardt and Kendra Wilkinson in 2008 shortly before Hefner and Madison broke up. (Photo: Getty Images for AFI)
The 42-yr-antique model says she had problem "connecting with different humans" ever since she was a toddler. Her mom even suspected Madison has Aspergers, a form of autism spectrum ailment, that's while human beings have issue with social interaction.
"I assume I become interested in try and be in the highlight due to the fact I felt like if I will be famous, that would be a shortcut to feeling a reference to human beings," the truth megastar provides in Secrets of Playboy.
When she first went to the Playboy Mansion at age 20, Madison noticed "a healthful ecosystem" and craved the sense of community it regarded to provide. She "was capable to buy into" having a dating with a much older Hefner as she "in no way related" with men her own age.
The first night time Madison went out with Hefner and his lady partners, he provided her a Quaalude, purportedly telling her "they used to name these thigh-openers in the '70s." Madison did now not take the drug, but admits to drinking heavily. When they were given returned to the mansion, she went upstairs with Hefner and the other girls.
"There turned into honestly, like, no romance or seduction or anything like that," Madison remembers of her first night with Hefner, noting there has been a film screen of pornography in the front of his mattress. "The ladies were surrounding him."
"I never had casual intercourse with every body before. I sense like I turned into kind of truly asexual, so maybe I just wasn't prepared for that," she says. "It become all very mechanical and robotic and you'll sort of comply with the opposite girls's lead. It became sincerely gross to me how Hef didn't need to apply safety. The effect it had on me turned into so heavy. I by no means predicted to be the first person to have intercourse that night or to be, like, driven into it."
Madison contemplating herself as asexual might sound stunning to a few humans, for the reason that Hefner and Playboy are the antithesis. But Secrets of Playboy director Alexandra Dean tells Yahoo Entertainment she wasn't amazed how Madison defined herself earlier than moving into that dating.
"By the time I heard that, I talked to a number of former playmates who had stated some thing comparable. And what I found out about the Playboy girls is extra frequently than not, they came from some historical past wherein they felt a few battle with their sexuality or their splendor," Dean shares. "Some of [the women] had been in homes wherein they suffered abuse of some sort ... Or had a form of abuse before they got here to Playboy. Or like Holly, had a youth in which they felt a few sort of disassociate disorder in order that once they got here to Playboy they were not really equipped to shield themselves."
Some of Hefner's friends participate within the series and portray Madison as the one who sought him out. When requested if Madison is a victim, Dean says she would not "just like the phrase victim."
"I find it is a totally passive word and humans are not generally passive or active. We're a combination, right? And I suppose Holly is like the relaxation folks, a mix," she tells us. "I suppose Holly has a whole lot of company in her existence and she or he can be the first man or woman to personal that. But do I suppose that Playboy exploited her? Yeah, I do. Even though she surely walked in, , in many methods along with her eyes open, it is nevertheless possible to take advantage of someone in that state of affairs."
Madison calls Hefner "manipulative" in the collection and describes the atmosphere on the Playboy Mansion as "cult-like." Many dark moments the superstar references are ones she mentioned in her 2015 memoir Down the Rabbit Hole.
Related video: Holly Madison info "stressful" first night with Hugh Hefner
"I suppose the motive that Holly decided to do that docuseries is that I was in a position to say to her, 'Look — what is thrilling to me approximately your book is it's resonating with those stories I'm hearing from the beyond, and I can kind of put it in context right here,'" Dean explains.
Secrets of Playboy functions archival footage and one-of-a-kind interviews including former director of Playmate Promotions Miki Garcia, past girlfriends of Hefner's, former Playmates and greater.
"Like I failed to suppose that what [Holly's] announcing is just the 2000s or just The Girls Next Door technology. I think what she changed into announcing changed into sort of the top of the iceberg, honestly," Dead adds.
Bridget Marquardt, one in every of Hefner's ex-girlfriends who also starred on The Girls Next Door, corroborates a number of Madison's claims. Noticeably absent from Secrets of Playboy is Kendra Wilkinson. Dean confirms she approached Wilkinson to participate, but Hefner's former female friend turned into now not fascinated. Wilkinson has stood by way of Hefner in current years, clashing publicly with Madison.
Wilkinson has yet to comment on a number of the stressful claims made inside the collection. But Hefner's son, Cooper, spoke out in protection of his father in advance of Monday's two-element ideal. "These salacious tales are a case examine of regret becoming revenge," he tweeted on Sunday.
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The Hefner family bought its last stocks in Playboy in 2018, one year after Hef's passing. A spokesperson for Playboy issued the subsequent assertion to Yahoo Entertainment about the documentary:
The Hefner own family is now not associated with Playboy, and these days’s Playboy isn't Hugh Hefner’s Playboy. We trust and validate these girls and their tales and we strongly help those individuals who've come ahead to percentage their experiences. As a brand with sex-positivity at its middle, we agree with protection, safety, and responsibility are paramount. The most important aspect we are able to do right now is actively pay attention and examine from their experiences. As an organisation with a greater than 80 percentage woman staff, we're devoted to confronting any parts of our legacy that don't reflect our values nowadays, and persevering with the development we've got made to conform as a company so we are able to power high quality exchange for our employees and our communities.
Secrets of Playboy premieres tonight at nine p.M. On A&E.
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